is it really possible to overcome LGBT feelings?
The Bible doesn’t promise an easy fix for our temporary struggles here on earth. But what it does is to promise that everything is possible for those who trust God (Mark 9:23).
This is not to blame anyone; if you’re still struggling with things in your life, it doesn’t mean your trust in God is not good enough. This is rather a call to persevere in that trust. At the end of the day, what kind of trust is the trust that disappears when things in the natural are wavering or uncertain? Don’t we have greater reasons for our trust in God? He gave His life for us in His Son, gave us a new nature, raised us up together and made us sit together with Him in heavenly places (Ephesians 2:6). If we believed that, then we can definitely continue to trust Him for all the rest (Philippians 1:6).
When we question what God has said it’s like questioning His character. There are things that God clearly states in His Word, like “you overcome the enemy by the blood of Jesus and the word of your testimony” (Revelation 12:11), “I give you authority to trample over every snake and scorpion and nothing will harm you” (Luke 10:19), “take heart, I have overcome the world” (John 16:33) and “no temptation has overtaken you” (1 Corinthians 10:13). When we question what God has already said, we’re like the serpent in Eden, who came to Eve and started off with “did God really say?” (Genesis 3:1).
So maybe the right question to ask would be: how do you overcome LGBT feelings?
Revelation speaks about the saints (meaning us, the children of God) saying that we overcome by the blood of Jesus and the word of our testimony (Rev 12:11).
Why the blood of Jesus? Because it’s the most powerful substance in the whole universe, it’s full of life, perfect, divine, uncorrupted DNA. And because in Jesus there is life (John 1:4). And because life is in the blood (Leviticus 17:11).
1 John 1:7 says that the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all unrighteousness. It’s active, constant. So, as long as we’re under the flow of Jesus’ blood, we’re being purified.
There’s no forgiveness without the blood of Jesus (Ephesians 1:7). There’s no forgiveness without repentance (Mark 1:15).
If you haven’t made Jesus Christ the Saviour and Lord of your life, you must do this before continuing; Saviour because He’s the only One who can atone for your sin and make a way for you to God the Father (John 14:6), He’s the only mediator between you and the Father (1 Timothy 2:5), and Lord because once He saves you, your life belongs to Him, as he paid for it on the cross with His own life (1 Corinthians 6:20).
By that you acknowledge you give Him the rights over your life to save you and to lead you.
Why the word of our testimonies? Because testimonies release the power of God (Revelation 19:10). A testimony declares what God has done and prophesies that He can do it again in the lives of others.
We overcome by exposing the lies in our minds.
The battlefield where it all happens is in the mind. Satan has come with deception from the beginning of the world and continues to this day. He is able to deceive by using something that has a bit of truth in it and twists it to bring pain and sin, just as he did in the garden.
When we realise that’s the way he operates we will understand that the truth sets us free (John 8:32).
In every specific situation there is the truth and a bunch of lies. The devil lies as he is the father of lies and lies originated from him (John 8:44). Sometimes there would also be false truths, or half-truths. We need to practice discernment and identify which is which. When we spot the lie, it must be cancelled and replaced with the truth. The Holy Spirit, who is the Spirit of truth, will guide you as He inhabited you when you gave your life to Jesus (Romans 8:9). He will always lead you in the truth of the Bible. He will never do or say anything against or different from what’s in the Word of God.
Oftentimes our feelings and emotions will encapsulate those lies. In those moments it’s essential to be reminded that we walk by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7); in other words, we follow the truth of God and not what we see or feel in the natural.
A lie is cancelled by speaking out loud, in prayer. It can go like this:
“I cancel the lie that (fill in the blanks). The truth is that (declare what the Word says about that specific situation).”
Example:
“I cancel the lie that I am cursed to have a life of pain and inner turmoil. The truth is that my Father has plans to prosper me and not to harm me, He has hope for me (Jeremiah 29:11). My life is hidden with Christ in God, is protected, is surrounded by Him (Colossians 3:3). I receive life in abundance, grace, peace, joy, comfort, strength, etc (John 10:10).”
Agreements are another way for the enemy to enter. When we agree with lies, we open a door for deception or confusion. The same when we speak ungodly, unprofitable words. The Bible says that we’ll be held responsible for every unprofitable word we would have said (Matthew 12:36).
Breaking agreements is not difficult.
“I renounce agreeing with/that (fill in the blanks). I renounce believing that ___”.
Example:
“I renounce agreeing with what Bob said about me, that I am unlovable, undesirable, and ugly. I renounce believing that nobody will ever love me, that I will always be lonely.”
In all this process it’s important to be accompanied by a sensitive heart to the Holy Spirit and a deep conviction of repentance. Believing lies is not pleasing in the sight of the Lord, so we must repent. Praise God He’s gracious and quick to forgive, so that His forgiveness is instant.
“I repent of believing all these lies. I am sorry, Lord. I choose truth, the truth of Your Word, the truth of what You say. I trust You. I receive Your forgiveness and comfort.”
We overcome by forgiving.
This is a big key for healing and deliverance. The Bible says that we must overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21). So, when somebody wrongs us, we are to forgive them.
Now, I know, I know! Forgiveness is not easy. There are some horrible things out there people have done to you. I hear you. But you also, hear me out!
When we forgive it does not mean that we agree with what they did to us, or that it wasn’t wrong. It does not mean that they are not guilty either. It only means that we withdraw from the position of judge, because only God is judge, and we trust Him to deal with them (James 4:12, Romans 12:19).
We also fulfil Jesus’ command in Mark 11:25, Matthew 6:14-15, Luke 6:37, Matthew 6:12.
Also, if we put in balance their guilt towards us and our personal guilt towards God, which was leading to death, it seems like what they did isn’t as unforgivable at the end of the day, is it? And great news is that we have the Holy Spirit to empower us to forgive, we don’t have to do it alone or in our human strength!
And remember: forgiveness is not a feeling, it’s a decision. Sometimes you won’t feel like forgiving nor feel any great release afterwards. That’s because your heart has to obey, surrender and let go. Jesus said we must abide in Him, in the truth, in what is right, even when it doesn’t feel like that. By abiding in Him we get to actually become more like Him, and what’s happening on the inside of us gets shaped and aligned with His good will.
Forgiveness doesn’t excuse the person who did the wrong, but releases you from them and them from you. When you forgive you declare that you don’t hold them accountable for what they did but give that to God; you admit you are not the judge, but He is the Judge and He will deal with the person in His way and timing. It basically means you declare that you trust your Father in heaven to handle the situation.
As you’ve probably understood, unforgiveness is sin, so while in this process it is also important to ask God for forgiveness for it.
“Lord, I choose to forgive my dad for hurting me when he shouted at me telling me it would’ve been better if I hadn’t been born. I also forgive him for never or barely telling me any kind and encouraging words, for not showing me love in the way I needed it. What he did wasn’t right. But I choose to forgive him because You forgave me too. I choose to forgive him because I trust You and I release him from the prison in which I have kept him all along.
And I am sorry I lived in unforgiveness for all these years. I let it all go now, in Jesus’ name.”
Break ungodly soul ties.
We are spirit – soul – body beings. We are wired for relationships, we long to connect with each other on different levels, spiritually, emotionally, physically. We love hugs, kisses, we like to be seen, known, tapped on a shoulder, to shake hands, be listened to, be cried or laughed with – all these things make us human. It’s how God created us. And it’s good.
But, unfortunately, the fall brought with it the counterfeit and illegitimate copies of many of those good things; it also corrupted relationships and the way we do them. You know how God says that husband and wife reach a specific level of unity and become one (Genesis 2:24, Mark 10:8)? You remember the very close friendship between David and Jonathan (1 Samuel 18)? Or the corrupted relationship between Ahab and Jezebel (1 Kings 16-21)? There’s a specific chemistry between people, our souls, our bodies.
Without complicating it too much, whenever two persons develop a very strong relationship there is a tie between them, which can be good or bad.
Therefore, when you go in prayer ask God if there is any ungodly tie in your life connected to another person. A big red flag could be people you had sexual encounters with outside of marriage, manipulative or controlling relationships, relationships where there was any kind of abuse, occult practices and witchcraft.
Ask God and listen. Then bring before Him those people He’s highlighted and forgive them. Repent of any ungodly interaction between you and them and receive His forgiveness. Then ask Jesus to break the ungodly soul tie and restore to you all that has been given away or unrightly stolen from your heart.
“Holy Spirit, please bring to my mind any ungodly connection with people in my life that hasn’t been broken.”
Then listen, there might be a name that comes to your mind. Maybe one, maybe more. If you don’t know or don’t remember the names of the people, or if they are too many, bring them before the Lord as a group, trusting that He knows everyone by name.
“Lord, I bring before You the relationship I had with Andrew. I forgive him for manipulating me by taking advantage of my brokenness. I release him from the unforgiveness and bitterness I have been carrying. I don’t hold him accountable anymore for that guilt. I give it over to you.
I repent of my involvement in this ungodly relationship. I repent of saying that I will never be able to live without him and I break that statement in Jesus’ name. I repent of being sexually involved with him, of lust, and of breaking my commitment with You. I plead You blood over me to wash me clean of all unrighteousness. Thank You for forgiving me. I bless Andrew as well and I pray Your hand to be upon him.
I ask You, Lord, break any soul tie between me and Andrew and restore to my heart whatever was stolen or given out of my ignorance and naivety. Also, whatever I took or accepted from him in my behaviour, attitude, thinking, perspective, please return it back to him. And everything else from him that is still attached to me that I’m not aware of please remove it from me. Thank You for sorting out this mess.”
Now, of course, it’s your responsibility to walk in purity and wisdom. Once a soul tie is broken don’t go back to the same person to do the same things again. Commit yourself to Jesus and pursue holiness. In many cases there might be need for deliverance as well. We encourage you to reach out to your pastors if they do this or to some other trusted ministers.
We overcome together in transparency and vulnerability.
We are the body of Christ here on earth. A body is composed of multiple members and organs that work together in perfect harmony. Not one organ of the body is able to survive by itself. If you cut off an arm, it will die very quickly and start putrefying. It is not designed to exist apart from the body. We don’t really get to see walking arms on the street, do we?
It’s exactly the same with the body of Christ. The Bible says we are members of Christ (Romans 12:5). When we are not actively involved in the body, in the church, when we live like we don’t belong to it, we are as a stomach removed from the body and thrown away, eaten by bugs. Because we are designed to be in the body, not outside of it.
Community is essential for every believer, not just for those struggling with their identity or sexuality. It’s through community that we grow, mature, receive healing, love, affirmation and learn to walk in our purpose and calling.
Many struggles with identity and sexuality have at their root issues of intimacy and attachment, the desire to connect and be known. It makes sense that a big contributor towards healing in this area will happen through community.
It’s when we open up to trustworthy friends, pastors and mentors that we can be loved in the midst of difficulties and mess. Think about it: it’s quite easy to feel loved and accepted when you perform well as a Christian, but what about moments when you fail to do so?
Could it be that we attribute to God the same treatment we receive from others?
Could it be that our image about God is shaped by what we see in the people of God around us?
Could it be that we connect with the Father just as we connect with a friend, meaning that if our earthly relationships are superficial and based on performance we’ll have the same relationship with God?
These are questions to prayerfully think about, questions that are really important in your pursuit of freedom.
The people I know to walk in freedom from confusion, addiction and you name it, are people that have a strong network of mentors and friends whom they are transparent and vulnerable with.
Accountability is something that scares many of us. Maybe you also used to think: “If they only knew the real me, if they only knew what I did, what I watched..”. Let me tell you it’s never as bad as you think. There’s nothing new under the sun. Most probably those people you have around have been themselves through similar issues to some level or have known others who have.
Of course, be led in wisdom. Opening up to just everyone is foolish. Make sure you approach those people God is putting on your heart and don’t act based on emotions, but rather be led by the Spirit.
Having two or three grown up people in your life, men and women of God, ideally of the same sex as you, who are mature and hungry for the Lord is life changing.
The moment I started to open up to people in my life in this way, I have to confess that layers of shame and pressure fell off me.
The truth is that the devil likes to operate in the secret and to keep things there in isolation. That’s how he keeps you bound in shame and condemnation. The moment we bring them in the open, through confession, we do exactly the opposite of what he wants. The Bible says in James 5:16 “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working”. There’s no complete healing without confession. Those saying that confessing to God is enough, let me quote again for you guys, from Amplified translation: Therefore, confess your sins to one another [your false steps, your offenses], and pray for one another, that you may be healed and restored. The heartfelt and persistent prayer of a righteous man (believer) is able to accomplish much [when put into action and made effective by God—it is dynamic and can have tremendous power].
We overcome by loving on Jesus.
Many ask me how I have overcome. The thing is that there’s no quick fix to our human brokenness. There’s no magic pill I can give to anyone. The only thing that changed my life was a living, authentic relationship with Jesus Christ.
Talking with people almost everyday it strikes me how many of them don’t have intimacy with Jesus! Sometimes I am shocked. They might read their Bibles (in the best case), they might pray to Him (asking Him to do things for them), and they might worship Him with singing and might go to church; all of these are good and you should be doing them. But where’s the quiet time, that specific, dedicated time when you just sit down with Jesus and get to know Him? Most of the time people tell me they aren’t doing that.
Think of a relationship between people: you will never have a personal relationship with me if you don’t get to know me personally. You can know about me, you can read about me, you can observe me, yeah. But in order to have a real relationship with me, where you know me intimately – meaning knowing what I like, what are the longings of my heart, what are my plans, what grieves me, what makes me laugh – you must take that time to spend it with me, not to ask me to do things for you, but to simply get to know me. And same vice versa. Now, of course God knows you, because He created you, but there’s no relationship if there’s no communication. He wants to hear from you because He’s interested in you!
By having this personal time with the Lord, He will surely lead you and show you everything you have to know, step by step. Jesus is not a technical God, He’s a relational and personal one. He wants your heart more than you want His. And honestly, you can have all the wisdom and follow diligently all this advice I have provided in this article, but ultimately, if you don’t have that relationship that I’m talking about there’s no real freedom. Because freedom is only in Him (2 Corinthians 3:17) .
There’s so much more to go into, but this could be a good starter. And the Holy Spirit is the best teacher, He will lead you into all truth (John 16:13) if you surrender and allow Him to.
Everything I described may be touching on aspects of our walk with Jesus that may sound difficult to do alone. If that is the case, feel free to contact for support. We are also happy to answer questions. Email us at info@core-issues.org or DM us on instagram or X.